He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
She's okay as an interesting car wreck. But as a sexual object she's funny
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Hippo gnu deer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I don't know. Seeing the vagina stretched out beyond normal proportions is like watching your favorite superhero die.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
Randomize