Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
I thought that wasn't a thing ever since she showed you her vag on the dance floor
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
How to not get laid: tell him he reminds you of your brother. While having sex. Thanks, vodka.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
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