okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Besides the fact that the only male who has shown an interest in me in the last 5 months has a strange and unfortunate resemblance to fucking Frodo, I've been good thanks
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Randomize