just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
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