Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
Randomize
