i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Took an impromptu nap on the floor of a starbucks bathroom using my backpack as a pillow. Please tell me you have been this hungover
I poured myself a glass of chocolate chips at some point during the evening.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
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