my vag is so smooth its legendary
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
would it be completely unacceptable to smoke a cig outside naked? im already doing it so what you say doesn't matter.
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
Randomize
