Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
