he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
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She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Your ass just called me, someone was yelling "awful waffle" and also, " I don't know who's hands are who's anymore"
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
You know its a good sign when a girl asks who everyone is AFTER she flashes her tits to the room.
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
Randomize