It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
ask me again when I'm sobewr aka tuesday
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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