Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Dude we just exchanged Zelda related pickup lines. I fell in love at "you can blow on my ocarina"
Randomize
