Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
your room smells of hookers.
And success
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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