so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Walking actually physically hurts. We should do it again some time.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Randomize
