Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I look like a sausage in jean shorts, you should have woken up earlier and approved my outfit.
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Randomize
