omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
He gave me a book last time I slept there. Im beginning to feel like a really weird hooker. Like instead of money he gives me random shit he has lying around. like hamburger buns
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
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