Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
She's like the Michael Jordan of alcoholism
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I woke up at 5am on my couch, naked, with a cereal bowl of water next to me. Apprently, drunk me thought I was a kitten last night. Super impressed I slept next to the bowl all night and didn't spill a drop.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
The next time you invite me out to a bar full of cougars warn me first. I never felt like a piece of meat before.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
