so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
we just finished making mockaritas... then we prayed
god you guys know how to party
worst. bachelorette party. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
I have to stop letting him stay all weekend. I feel like a cored apple.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize