Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
You woke up, looked straight at me and screamed "fuck barbara streisand!" and passed out again
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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