can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Don't read too much into what I just sent. I love you, always have, but I'm drunk and sorry for the confusion.
Which part? The boyfriend or the sex?
Boyfriend. SEX IS ON!!!
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize
