He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She interrupted us having sex in the tent by threatening to kill us if we "got cum on the lasanga."
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
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On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
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The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
I'm bleeding and have questions
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