Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
She came over with Guinness cupcakes, a case of Mickeys, wearing an Ireland flag & nothing else.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
A woman with Alzheimer's pointed at me and said, "Don't forget to wear socks, because you're a lady!" I think it's legit advice.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Randomize
