yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
I was passed out on the dog bed yelling "I UNDERSTAND"
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
We can't do acid Disneyworld.
Randomize
