'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
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