is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
I'm so bored I talked to the Bible guys for 30 minutes.
I offered them beer last time they came here bahaha
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize
