the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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