Just mADE A PArabola og urine
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
it was like his penis was on wheels.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
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