It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
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