Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
You were dancing on the bar and fell off into the arms of the hot bartender. It was like a fairy tale, with more alcohol.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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