I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
It wasn't until like 4 and when we got off the phone you said god was summoning you back into the bar
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
Randomize
