How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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