So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Our new roommate is sitting in the living room wearing a snuggie and clutching a handle of burnett's mixed with what appears to be crystal light and sobbing over a documentary about a dead race horse.
I know. Isn't she utterly fantastic?
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
Randomize