He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
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