So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
Randomize
