Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
My ex is having a baby and I'm over here planning my dogs birthday celebration...
When is the party?
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize
