i barfeds in our rink
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
our cab driver is having phone sex.
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
