my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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