So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Just because you were able to pour the entire bottle of wine into 2 glasses does not mean you took it easy last night.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Randomize
