I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
I just saw the nastiest chick.
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
He told me to put on my big boy pants, then take them off and fuck her before he smacks me with a chair. His pep talks suck.
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
I think I'm going to go into my next therapy session with hot client with my fly down and when he tells me about it I'm going to say "how did that happen?!" and then porn music will start to play.
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.