Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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