we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
After drinking all day I popped an adderal, slammed three beers in a row, apparently told the bartender "thanks bitch" then ran on stage.
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize