drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
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