At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Not gonna make it. My ovaries are playing laser tag
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
MIDGETS
????
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Yeah I'm just gonna stay here and spread my horniness to the world.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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