Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
You were screaming at a bartender last night for not referring to you as god.
and apparently I tried to pay for beer with a tampon.
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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