I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
No, the moral of my Oxford interview was "Never snort caffeine pills".
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
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