guys are not supposed to queef...right?
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
If you don't sing me a lullaby then I'll just take shots till I pass out
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
But I've also made plans to crash a black tie event wearing a storm trooper helmet. I think I've found the love of my life..
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
