There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
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