i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
