FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
So I had this brilliant idea that I would sleep in all sorts of sweatpants and sweatshirts... Apparently I thought I could "sweat" off the drunk in my sleep and that it would make me feel better when I woke up
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
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