the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.