Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
